Connecting


What a great topic for Valentine’s day!

After having looked into meaning and (re)framing, we are now ‘connecting’. Social media are all about connecting, with Blogs, LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter … Please don’t underestimate the importance; you feel so much stronger if you know that you are not alone.

Reading the chapter about connecting in “How remarkable women lead” from Joanna Barsh, I was traveling to a meeting of an association. On the agenda were some points that could lead to heavy discussions and conflict. I didn’t agree with the suggestions made in the agenda at all. My first impulse was, to go into defense. I would tell them very clearly that I didn’t agree, and that we have to do it totally different (‘my way’). And I was reading about connecting and inclusiveness in the train.

That made me realize, that there is another option. The members of the association share certain values; that’s why they joined. I share a lot of my values and ideals with the others. So I took that as base, and started to see the suggestions as not more than that: suggestions to talk about, to find the best solution together.

And it worked! The atmosphere of the meeting was relaxed instead of tense, we discussed our ideas of the solution, and put emphasis on what unites us, instead of what parts us. This showed me the importance of the five aspects of centered leadership!

Inclusiveness is a deep feeling of connecting, and it is very powerful. If you realize it in work, you start to feel connected to your company like you do to your family. Other sides of connecting include designing your network, daring to ask for help, and reciprocity. I’ll write about these sides later.

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